So I visited Mount Pleasant and Central Michigan University for the first time since this past June. In the past five years this is the longest I have ever been away from CMU between visits.
The campus looks relatively the same with minor changes and new buildings here and there. The Bird looked exactly as I remembered it and it took my graduating and moving 1200 miles away to finally motivate me to carve my pseudonym into the table we were sitting at.
I missed my friends dearly and it was so good to see them, sit with them, talk with them, and just be in their presence again. Even with news and events happening this weekend, when the chips are down (I hate that cliche' but it just came to me) it was nice to again have a testament to the type of friends I make and their dedication to me and our friendship. When one of the "buildings" in your life starts to crumble its people like them that you want at your side. Sure we had our differences and didn't get along all the time. But we were always friends, and will always be so. Thank you friends and brothers.
What really struck me was how easy it was to leave again. I was expecting to be hit with an overwhelming sense of anxiety and panic as I was leaving my past home. However, I though only of how much fun I had over the past few days and how much I looked forward to visiting again in the coming year. I guess I really am past the college experience. I am definitely not past the mentality or my friends, but I am most certainly not desiring to return to my undergraduate days.
I suppose I am just adjusting further to my new position in life. I am grown. As much as I want to fight it and wish that it wouldn't be so I have to accept the fact that I am no longer a "stupid high school kid" or a "poor college student" nor am I a "directionless twenty-something" I am a young professional. A twenty-something with aspirations and desires to succeed. That adjustment seems to be the most difficult thing for me.
The change from high school to college almost killed me. With new surroundings, few familiar faces, and a girlfriend who was more of an emotional burden than a help I attempted to move into a new frightening phase in my life. I guess until I visited CMU this past week I didn't realize how much my change from college to adulthood is very much the same. A good friend told me that I cannot live my life with my heart back in Michigan. I try very hard to live by that principle. However, accepting the fact that a piece of my heart will always be here is a hard thing to swallow as well. This adjustment will be difficult. Even with some of the previous mentioned evils eliminated, it will still be by far the hardest thing I have ever tried to do.
successes and failures to be relayed later...
Thursday, December 30, 2010
Monday, December 20, 2010
Almost a year gone and so much change.
Well, I suppose I should take this downtime to engage in some reflection as well as chronicle my thoughts to look back on later..
Almost a year since my last entry and I haven't run out of gas since then. I am going to count that as one very epic win. But other things have happened. I graduated from college, I got my first teaching job, I moved out on my own and 1200 miles away, I found and lost love almost instantly, I have made a great many new friends, and I have directed my first successful high school musical, and I have found a whole new appreciation for my family and where I grew up.
Kansas life is very different from life in America's High-Five. Life is a little slower paced, there is a slight southern draw in everyday speech, and the cultural and socioeconomic situations are far from the same. I never really considered Grand Rapids to be a center of industry and commerce but after moving to Garden City I realize how different life would have been growing up in a city that is truthfully built on the farming industry. It's pretty crazy how different the two places are.
Geographically Kansas leaves a great deal to be desired in the aesthetics department. Now its not completely flat as I am sure most think it is, as I thought it was. But the hills roll so gently that even when they are around you don't even notice them. The lack of rolling hills however, does not compare to the lack of rolling waves. The Great Lakes are truly a treasure taken for granted.
My life is so busy now with teaching and all the responsibility that goes along with the title. I am learning to navigate the professional world that I have chosen and have decided that a great deal of the time, the students are much easier to talk to than some of my colleagues. But I am surviving and doing much more bridge building than burning. I seem to be rather well liked and my name is being shouted in the hallways much more often by students and staff greeting me. A good feeling.
Personally, I have discovered how independent I can be. Don't get me wrong I am someone who thrives on large groups of people and love a party full of smiling faces. But I have discovered living alone is something that I can do and do well. I enjoy my quiet evenings and coming home to things exactly as I left them. I do miss roommates and having long discussions with hard laughter, but who is to say that those things won't come back into my life? Overall, I am slowly realizing that I am growing up. While, I am obligated by my inner child to fight this natural progression of mental maturity, I can't help but sort of enjoy developing my adult life and begin what I can only hope will be a long line of successes marked with learning experiences and mild speed bump failures.
Almost a year since my last entry and I haven't run out of gas since then. I am going to count that as one very epic win. But other things have happened. I graduated from college, I got my first teaching job, I moved out on my own and 1200 miles away, I found and lost love almost instantly, I have made a great many new friends, and I have directed my first successful high school musical, and I have found a whole new appreciation for my family and where I grew up.
Kansas life is very different from life in America's High-Five. Life is a little slower paced, there is a slight southern draw in everyday speech, and the cultural and socioeconomic situations are far from the same. I never really considered Grand Rapids to be a center of industry and commerce but after moving to Garden City I realize how different life would have been growing up in a city that is truthfully built on the farming industry. It's pretty crazy how different the two places are.
Geographically Kansas leaves a great deal to be desired in the aesthetics department. Now its not completely flat as I am sure most think it is, as I thought it was. But the hills roll so gently that even when they are around you don't even notice them. The lack of rolling hills however, does not compare to the lack of rolling waves. The Great Lakes are truly a treasure taken for granted.
My life is so busy now with teaching and all the responsibility that goes along with the title. I am learning to navigate the professional world that I have chosen and have decided that a great deal of the time, the students are much easier to talk to than some of my colleagues. But I am surviving and doing much more bridge building than burning. I seem to be rather well liked and my name is being shouted in the hallways much more often by students and staff greeting me. A good feeling.
Personally, I have discovered how independent I can be. Don't get me wrong I am someone who thrives on large groups of people and love a party full of smiling faces. But I have discovered living alone is something that I can do and do well. I enjoy my quiet evenings and coming home to things exactly as I left them. I do miss roommates and having long discussions with hard laughter, but who is to say that those things won't come back into my life? Overall, I am slowly realizing that I am growing up. While, I am obligated by my inner child to fight this natural progression of mental maturity, I can't help but sort of enjoy developing my adult life and begin what I can only hope will be a long line of successes marked with learning experiences and mild speed bump failures.
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